Keeping My Head Down

Let’s have some real talk about the questions I’ve been getting lately (and this is probably more for me than y’all). This one is all me with the boat the next one over covering all of the questions I get on my boat, hop to all things Island Girl RIGHT HERE.

I am so insanely excited about being back in Charleston! And having my life back! And everyone! And all the champagne! It is all just so massively, over the top happiness! Yet, I’ve still been kind of MIA on the social scene (even though I did sneak out for some fun this weekend).

Being back is hard on a multitude of levels. I didn’t really plan on being here let alone think I was ready to come back, all of this is a transition. Like a transition that was decided on a Tuesday and I was in Charleston on the following Friday. What can I say? I’m a rambling rose ready to hop briar patches with the change of winds.

Honestly, I feel like hiring a band, stringing up some cafe lights, setting up a bar, and inviting everyone I’ve ever met over…which is my major problem. I am completely ready to go back to fun when I actually need to work on my work life balance. As an adult, I should be able to follow a schedule with time for everything and everyone. Unfortunately, I am just not that kind of adult (I mean, have we ever met?!).

That is why my self imposed grounding in my little dorm in Tuscaloosa was good for me on a work level, yet bad for me on a mental/emotional level. I do my best when I’m shuttered off from everything, zoned in on a project with a light blinking from the end of the tunnel when I emerge. Tuscaloosa was hella solo with a couple outstanding friends, still skewed heavier on the isolation.

Right now, I’ve got some major deadlines. Mega deadlines this week, uber deadlines next week, hella deadlines at the end of the month.

Even though I am pee my pants excited, this week I’m going to have to be head in the sand, knocking out deadlines with some appearances to my old life when I take a break, hit a wall, or smack it right out of the ballpark. After I get through the crunch of this, I’m going to try to find a better way to handle all of my everything.

If I haven’t seen you yet, it is not you. It is absolutely 100% me. Legit, I was here for 6 days before I saw anyone outside of the house and even then she came by the house to drop something off. I want to see every single person I’ve ever met in Charleston, I just can’t tackle getting a handle on the precarious weaving of everything until I square away some other stuff first.

If not, then I’ll just continue one extreme to the next. I’ll be the socialite recluse who disappears for weeks at a time only to bust out of my cocoon to host absolute parties of the year. That sounds way more interesting anyways…and dangerously like Gatsby. I should maybe rethink that plan…

Just stick with me y’all! I’m working out the kinks and trying to work y’all all back in. For the first time in my life, I’m easing into the shallow end instead of a cannonball into the deep end. Totally new for me.

But yeah, I love all of y’all so much and I can’t wait to see all your faces! Give me some of your astounding patience and I promise I’ll get all this anxiety tampered down enough to be fun, to be present, and to be the awesome friend I know I’ve got deep down in me.

As for why I’m back in Charleston, where I’m living, who is who, blah blah blah, that is a whole other post yet to be written. When I’ve got that figured out, I’ll share. All of it is still falling into place, I guess I’m getting more practice on the whole easing into things front then I realized. You’ll get the scoop as soon as I get a grasp on it myself.

*This is yet again more ramblings that have not been spellchecked or proofread instead kicked off the cuff from my phone without double thinking. Frustrating for the grammar patrol, liberating for my stream of conscious. I’d apologize, but we know you’re really here for all my random.*